Day 14: Epiphany

For the past few months, I've jokingly said I wasn't celebrating my birthday this year (I'm dreading 30, and it just got closer today). Today, I find myself alone. Just me and my dog, Boogie. Earlier I was feeling lonely and depressed that this is the first birthday I have spent alone. No friends or family present. That's when I realized, I got exactly what I asked for. Turns out, I didn't want it this way. I am a silly girl who just realized not only did I bring this upon myself, but that I have also been pushing people away from me. Fearing that they will get too close to see my scars of my past. My past is far from the definition of pretty and truthfully I am ashamed of my past. I am also ashamed of my behavior to those around me these past few months. I do love my friends and family, they are my world, yet I've not only been hurting myself, but everyone else by pushing them away. My apologies to you all.

Once I had my epiphany of the year, I went to Winn-Dixie to get some ingredients and snacks for Bible study tomorrow and a women's brunch on Saturday. I also purchased my own birthday cupcake. It was a devil's food sundae cupcake and it was HUGE!! 

After I silently wished myself a "happy birthday', I devoured that joker!!